The first thing on my mind when I was about to write this post was ... ''the title should be Unconditional Love". It has to be this.
In the past months, I learned a lot about how love works. The concept of love that I knew, or perhaps that I believe, is only a small part of the broad concept of love. Indeed, the human mind is limited, and so are our knowledge, understanding, and perception (or in this case, mine is). That's why when I have to describe myself or my job, I prefer calling myself a perpetual learner.
To be honest, if I were asked what love is, I couldn't describe or explain it very well. I would answer it only "something you can feel, something that exists without you having to try hard to question more. Just feel it". Not because I haven't felt it, nor because I don't have the capability to give it out. It is simply probably because of the limits of my knowledge about it. Or perhaps love itself can not be described or be answered clearly, can it?
Nevertheless, I have been feeling a lot of love in just the past few months, like I have been being showered by numerous of love that I have never thought deeply about it before. Also, I have never thought that I could shower much love on other people that deep, but strangely, I could.
It is my aunt who took care of me since I was like 2 weeks old when I was an infant. Indirectly, my life has been influenced by her. She liked listening to a lot of eclectic music, taking a lot of pictures (like a lot), traveling here and there, and most of all the hobby she liked to do.. was writing. It affects me to do what she did, and love them all as she was. She taught me how to be passionate, explore a lot of things, and love ourselves first. Once we did, we would be able to share the love as much as possible with others. That's the basic rule and it was what she has always done to us, her nieces and nephews.
We probably have a lot of pressures and workloads that make anxieties easily come and hard to go. But never forget that we also share life with others so we have to be kind to each other. Be kind to ourselves and be kind to others - her.
I wonder if this should be why I always feel sufficient. It is said that what we sow is what we reap. I think it is proved right to my aunt. In my core memory, if I recall it, I remember that I often had a fight with her. For as long as I remember, I even yelled bad words at her and hurt her feelings. However, she said that she never took that seriously, instead, she told me that she was the cause of my behavior in the past (she said that because she was temperamental too as she was in the middle of a quarter-life crisis). As she grows older, I do grow older, and both of us get closer too. It is strangely applied to the relationship between me and my mom.
Certainly, if we look for examples of unconditional love is the form of paternal love that our parents give to us. But it also applies the love beside it, at least it happens in my life. Unconditional love from my aunt to me, from my parents for me. I will never ever, ever, ever take that for granted and forever be grateful for that, even for their existence.
If I am being asked what unconditional love is, I still figure it how I answer it properly. But to be sure, i could give a thousand of examples of unconditional love as I have always been receiving it without i realize it.
